Anyone who's ever been in a relationship knows that arguments are a natural part of being together, yet many people don't understand where arguments stem from or why at times your significant other thinks something is wrong when nothing at all is. How do they sense these things or come to these conclusions? I currently live in with my boyfriend and took the time to test this theory one evening at home as we made dinner.
Our conversation started out quite pleasant as we chatted about our day and plans for the rest of the week. However, once my tasks were done I deliberately moved myself out of the room and at the opposite end of the apartment where I tried to continue on the conversation. Andrew, my boyfriend, could not understand me at all and a loss of communication ensued for several minutes before he realized I was still talking. He began to yell and ask what I was talking about before coming into the room I had moved to, rather frustrated to be put out of the way just to carry on our conversation, and asked what I was talking about.
After re-explaining we came to realize we had the perception of talking about two completely different things, I about something my hairdresser said while he thought I was talking about the puppy we were soon to purchase. Thus I moved back into the kitchen where we could both fully understand each other once more. There I changed my body language from my usual relaxed state to intentionally rigid. He instantly sensed it and asked what was wrong, when I said nothing he persistently asked me again and again if anything was wrong though it was nothing at all but a test!
[...] Interpersonal communication occurs on a daily basis and knowing the key points of effective dyadic conversations will create greater success and relationships through a lifetime. Works Cited Adler, Ronald B. and George Rodman, eds. Understanding Human Communication. 10th ed. New York: Oxford University Press Print. [...]
[...] Why your boyfriend thinks something is wrong? Anyone who's ever been in a relationship knows that arguments are a natural part of being together, yet many people don't understand where arguments stem from or why at times your significant other thinks something is wrong when nothing at all is. How do they sense these things or come to these conclusions? I currently live in with my boyfriend and took the time to test this theory one evening at home as we made dinner. [...]
[...] Next time my boyfriend and I begin a conversation over dinner I will not break the rules. I have learned from this experiment that while at times fun to see the reactions of others in this situation it is also detrimental to communication lines and could cause others to feel something is wrong with me in a physiological or psychological way. In interpersonal communication one should maintain a dyadic distance of a few feet, not many, and a natural, comfortable body language that allows openness from the other party. [...]
[...] Throughout this exercise I observed the rules of body language and distance while communicating in conversation with others. By changing my body language from relaxed to suddenly and without reason rigidity I “broke a rule” that most people generally use to gauge their audience in conversation. When I moved on to changing the distance of my conversation, by moving from the kitchen to an entirely different room in which my partner was not in, I changed the very nature of the communication we were experiencing at the time. [...]
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